Hank Moody

Look, I don’t want to take sides here, but I want to say, for the record, categorically, never.. never stick a finger up a grown man’s ass without warning. Don’t do it.

I just threw up in my mouth a little. You had 20 centuries of halfway decent verse to choose from and you’re going with some minor Frosty?

I consider that whole area – general area – my cock. Like, from my knees to my nipples – cock.

For a radical environmentalist such as yourself, this whole evening must have given you a clit-boner.

Do whatever you have to do. Beg, plead, cry. Get down on bended knee. ’cause I’m telling you, no amount of top-shelf pussy can compete with the love of a good woman.

Girls know at once whether they want to fuck, marry, or kill a guy. Which begs the question: how am I doing?

Fuck around all you want, I’m no judge Judy. But don’t string a woman along for a major chunk of her childbearing years. That’s not cool.

Just the fact that people seem to be getting dumber and dumber. I mean, we have all this amazing technology, and yet… computers have turned into basically four-figure wank machines. The internet was supposed to set us free, democratize us, but… But all it’s really given us is Howard Dean’s aborted candidacy and… 24-hour day acces to kiddy porn. People… They don’t write anymore. They blog. Instead of talking, they text… No punctuation, no grammar, L.O.L. this and L.M.F.A.O. that. It just seems to me that it’s just a bunch of stupid people pseudo-communicating with a bunch of other stupid people in a protolanguage that resembles more what cavemen used to speak than the King’s English.